Saturday, January 29, 2011

Erica, an Introduction

This blog is a bit of an admission of my sissy side. Only a few friends know about this side of me. To be honest even I didn't know it very well till recently. I still don't really know what it all means and whether it's more of an escape or a real part of myself, if that makes any sense. I'd had Bi thoughts since high school, though they were more vague at the time. More a curiosity that I sometimes felt when masturbating than a driving desire.

It made me think back to when I was a kid and sort of, rediscovered some things about my early sexual play. The first time I recall discovering the hot button between my legs was when I was straddling a tubular fence. I realized that rocking myself against the top of the fence produced some pleasurable feelings. I explored this more in private with, of all things, a piece of hard-sided luggage! I kid you not. Stand it up, put a pillow over the handle area and straddle it. Don't ask me where I got the idea. I was a kid, who knows how I came up with it. The point is that rocking against it felt good. I'm pretty sure that this was how I had my first orgasm. And it was good. 

This continued to be my prime manner of 'getting off' for a while. What changed was the addition of fantasy role play. Being a kid, I was familiar with all the cartoons of the day. Again, I can't explain the origins, but I recall that my favorite role to play wasn't Superman or Batman. It was . . . Wonder Woman or Supergirl. I say this  now with some embarrassment. Yet the truth is that I distinctly recall little role playing games as Supergirl. I remember pretending to be captured and held hostage by some nameless super villain. By 'captured' I mean that, on occasion, I did tie myself up to a limited degree. Things like using a belt to tie my legs together. It's a very bizarre thing to admit as an adult. Especially when you can't think of any place where the ideas came from.

Years later I struck gold one day while riding my bike home from a friend's house. It was a rural road, so not much traffic. I was passing one of those ubiquitous pull offs where so many morons insisted on dumping trash, being too lazy to actually drop it at the landfill. There it was, a brown paper bag, partially torn and spilling a wealth of adolescent fantasies. I'm talking the motherload: Cheri, Hustler, High Society, Penthouse, Playboy. There must have been a dozen of them. There was also, and it makes me wonder quite a bit now that I think back on it, a women's one piece swimsuit. As I'm sure you can imagine I stuffed this all, including I am forced to admit, the bathing suite into my saddle bags and peddled madly home. Since both my parents worked and my brother wasn't around much, I had the house to myself. I went through every one of those magazines, hands shaking all the while. Following the same inexplicable reasoning that had me keep it in the first place, I tossed the suit in the washer. This stash of naughty magazines was probably the start of my porn 'addiction'. 


  1. Nice start to your blog Erica. i think i know how how you feel. Super Girl is one of my favorites too, there is something intoxicating about being a helpless super heroine, maybe because she probably could have escaped but choses to be helpless and used.

    i think many of my bi and sissy fantasies and adventures come from childhood experiences too. There was an older boy across the street that would have me come over, strip and he would pretend i was this girl he had a crush on. i also found 2 women's bathing suits at the motel i worked at the summer before i started college. One of them was a velvety bikini and i often wore it, even once in the common hallway.

  2. Nice Blog, Don't fret you are perfect as you are and your "perversions" should not be denied by yourself. Enjoy your impulses that is what makes you human. Be Careful little sissy and have great fun!!!

  3. Wonderful to hear your first memories and experiences Erica. Yes, Super Girl and Wonderwoman, but also the Avengers (put avenger emma peel into google images and you’ll get the idea). I found my dad’s porn stash and my mums underwear drawer, and I was off on my own voyage of self discovery.


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